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My Life At The Movies: Virginity Hit

In the summer of 2000 I was preoccupied with skipping classes at Utah Valley State College. However, on one fateful afternoon, I decided to attend English 095. Arriving late I found myself interrupting the presentation of beautiful young girl by the name of Heather. Despite the fact that she was my mother’s namesake, I was willing to overlook this disturbing news if it meant seeing her under-dressed. Following an extremely short courting period I had her decorating my dorm room floor with her clothing, (just as I’d hoped). Yet, when all that stood between us were her purple panties, my anxiety overwhelmed my senses… especially my common ones. Meaning, I pushed Heather off me, lunged for my nearby robe, and ran naked from my own home into the night air. I was a virgin, and I wasn’t ready to find out what it meant to be otherwise.

This story is one of many that began flooding through my head as I watched the movie “Virginity Hit”; a hilarious mockumentary about a group of teens desperate to post the surrender of their friend’s “V-Card” on Youtube.

In typical teenage fashion, the film begins by highlighting the importance of ‘not’ being a virgin. To anyone still forced to undergo the hell that is hormones, being a virgin is like being unemployed. Even though no one can see it, it’s written like failure all over their face. In V.H. Matt is the one whose face is so tragically inked.

I was like Matt for a long time; desperately trying to create the perfect setting wherein to relinquish that which so many quickly vomit out. I know too well what it is like to obsess over the path instead of focusing on the prize.

On the other hand, I am well aware of the torment a young man must endure from his friends when he gets too Danielle Steele and not enough Daniel Boone. For years my friends were embarrassed by my inability to deliver the goods to any member of the female species. However, they were increasingly embarrassed when like Matt; I would be forced to endure public embarrassment because of a girl.

Without giving too much away, as the movie drew to a close I felt a healthy difference between me and Matt. Wherein I spent my adolescence trying to have sex, Matt instead enjoys his by stumbling into love. I’ve only recently recognized how contrasting the two truly are. From my anxious escapades in college to my current attempts at maturity in adulthood, I’ve learned it isn’t all about sex. Like Virginity Hit alludes to amidst the hilarity; it’s about family, friends, and that one female. At least it is at my life at the movies.

Jon Godfrey


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